there was a trapeze. enough said
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
