He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
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i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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