Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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