White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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