Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
