I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
