Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize
