Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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