They should really pass out barf bags in church
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize