Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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