It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
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