I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize