Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize