How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Randomize
