saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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