the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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