I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
