If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
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