That's intense
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
