i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
