So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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