I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
