it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
