why didn't you poke me back
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
