Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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