around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office