youre lurking in front of me
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize