Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
