You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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