just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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