dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
