just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize