lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
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We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
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I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
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