Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
My vagina is officially offended.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
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