Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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