I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
