: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Randomize
