everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
