Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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