This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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