I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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