Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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