doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
