I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
So gin and wine won't be happening again
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
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