How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
