Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
i out mim tonsoeep
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
