she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
