i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
handjob tips. give me some.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
