If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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