wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
